


So I can remember

by catladyrene



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I Tried, Light Angst, Mark Lee (NCT)-centric, No Dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-30 14:17:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20448497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catladyrene/pseuds/catladyrene
Summary: Mark is feeling tired and lonely, so he remembers...(Please check the notes cause for the life of me I CAN'T TAG)





	So I can remember

**Author's Note:**

> Yes hello.  
Disclaimer: This is a plotless mess I wrote on my way to work. Self-indulgent and inspired by my messed up feelings projected onto Mark (sorry Mark). The light angst and fluff are there, just not so evident. Still, I tagged them just to be safe. 
> 
> This is for these special people in my life that comfort me and make me happy, even when they're not there. I hope all of you out there have people like this in your life as well.
> 
> Enjoy!

Mark wants to remember.

  
He wants to remember a time when he wasn't so tired. When his body could actually function, his voice could actually come out not mumbled.

It has taken quite a toll on him this time. On all of them, to be frank. The back-to-back comebacks, the endless promos, the tour. He was terribly thankful, but also terribly exhausted. And he just couldn't remember a time when he wasn't. And god he wants to cry. But Mark Lee doesn't cry. He endures and he pushes through and he fights. To be successful. To be fully capable of anything and everything. To be perfect. 

So where is this perfect, fully capable Mark Lee now? Why isn't he fighting the exhaustion, pushing through like he always does? Why is Mark Lee, who never cries, actually crying right now?

Because tonight, he doesn't have the strength.

So he sits there and he thinks.

He thinks of Jaemin, who would smile at him with that huge smile of his, and he would pat his head, or pinch his cheeks, or maybe both, just to make him laugh.

  
Then he thinks of Jeno, who wouldn't say anything, but he would sit with him and suggest watching a movie, so he wouldn't feel alone.

  
Renjun would probably try to cook something. His cooking skills aren't as great as Jaemin's, but he would still try to whip up something decent, just to comfort him.

  
Chenle and Jisung would honestly just be themselves. They would talk and joke and laugh - only, a little less louder than usual. They would have Mark engage in an endless conversation about a pointless topic until he forgot his sadness.

  
And Donghyuck. Donghyuck would just look at him. With those sparkling eyes, hopeful like a sunrise and comforting like a sunset, he would be able to convey all the love, support, worry and comfort he wanted to give him. And Mark would feel every single one of these emotions and return them with a small smile. Donghyuck would understand that smile, the one he's seen many many times. The one that meant _thank you for always being with me, supporting me, believing me, loving me. _An "I love you" that, even if it wasn't said, it would be felt honestly and intensely.

  
Except, Donghyuck wasn't there at the moment. Neither were the rest of Dream, all too busy with preparations for their comeback. A comeback he wasn't a part of. Mark was alone. So all he could do was remember. Every moment, every laugh, every tear, every small and petty argument, every movie night, every practice session. That was the promise they had made to eachother when Mark graduated. If he ever felt alone, if he ever missed them and couldn't reach them, then he should remember. He should find comfort in the memories, only for a little while, till they were able to see eachother again. So that's what he did. Just for this night he'd have the memories to keep him company, make him feel a little better. And he'd make sure to see them the next time he was free.

The next time they met they put on a movie that they hardly watched, too busy chatting and teasing and laughing. And maybe Mark's smile was a little wider, more sincere. Because now Mark felt better, he felt at home.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! If you liked it, i feed off validation so kudos and comments are welcome!  
My @ on Twitter is @/catladyrene if you'd like to follow me or something... Thanks again!!!


End file.
